JOB HUNTING - and other epic acts of acrobatic faith.

Hello ladies and germs,
Once again, no piccies to light up my ramblings.  Working on that and will resolve that situation asap.  In the meantime, let's talk about job hunting.  Ahhhhhh yes....what an exercise in optimism, hope, disappointment and frustration.  I am currently up to my pierced ears in it...and pressing on reward less!  It's such a strange and wondrous endeavor really, especially now that it's predominantly done anonymously and on line.  You spend hours scouring the on line ads, trying to decipher the encoded messages between the lines of the postings.  Cause there there ya know......one must squint ever so hard at what you're reading.  Some of them paint a picture of such fun, reward, success and satchels of money being flung in your general direction!  Run! Those are the ones to blatantly ignore. You could end up duct taped crossing state lines in the back of a pick up!  I always find if the Ad sounds like a sales pitch...then you probably don't want the job - sure as shinola they're hiding the truth of what they're really offering.  Then you have the endless ads placed by recruiters - an entirely different playing field that.  Several clicks and you find yourself on a different site altogether.  One that sings extraordinarily high praise - to themselves.  But free representation and somebody ELSE out there doing some legwork for  you?  Why the heck not I say??  Do it all!  Enlist every resource you can! Perhaps they're good, perhaps not.  Hard to say really.....everyone is out there though and at the end of the day, there's nothing going on but the rent!  Gotta make a buck!  Try avoid being knuckle dragging miserable.  Play to your strengths.....remain determined and get that job you want!  Or panic entirely, look at the steadily increasing pile of bills and say....I'll just take something for the money...THEN I'll find something I really want.  Flash forward 10 years and you know how this tale of woe ends.
So many twists and turns, choices to make, and heaven for fend...COVER LETTERS TO WRITE!  It reminds me of shopping for a life at times.  Who do I want to be?  What should that look like?  Does what I want even exist?  And can I get paid to do it!  Legally? 
I sit in front of my laptop and I manically scroll through all the listings, one or two catching my eye.  Okay, this looks good, sounds like it makes sense, sounds like I'm qualified, sounds like it's the perfect job for me!  Wait, I think I fancy a cup of tea....I'll come back in a minnie.....
Yayyyyy!  I shall bang out a cover letter that will instantly make the reader fall madly in love with my potential and completely obsessed with getting me in front of them.  So I do.  Or at least I 'think' I do.  Then you wait.  Great efforts are made NOT to obsess and get your hopes up.  The silence continues.  Now you're checking your emails every hour.  Then it's every 10 minutes.  Nothing.  Nada.  Every time you open it up you hear the deafening siren song of a million crickets.  How can that BE?????  But I'm perfect for it!!!  Why don't they see that????  Hmmm.....maybe I'm not then.....maybe it's all in my mind.  Maybe I need to sell out and just take something.....who am I kidding anyhow and who do I think I am......STOP STOP AND STOP.  See I'm writing this just as much for me as I am to hopefully to entertain you.  Perhaps some of you can relate to this right now, but for sure we've all been here.  It's such a slippery slope to get discouraged and feel sorry for yourself.  It can be rather gutting at times truth be told.  When you receive that form letter saying you're great but we're just not that into you.....all of sudden that 'glorious fabulous job' becomes 'well it was a crap position anyhow and I totally dodged THAT bullet!' You wouldn't be human not to be affected emotionally.  HOWEVER......as my good friend Donald Trump says....ok, so he's not my good friend, but I'd like him to be......it's not personal, it's business.  One needs to take the emotional squishiness out of the equation.  It's rather an 'if it's meant to be, it will be' situation.  I mean how much control do you have?  You make sure your resume is banging.  You make sure your cover letter conveys a true sense of who you are, your skills and experience portrayed effectively,  all the while keeping it short and compelling.  You follow up.  You carry on.  And on and on.  
Off goes another resume and cover letter into the great black maw of the employers.  Sometimes I'll sit and fantasize about the person reading my application.  I wonder where they are.  What they're wearing.  Are they wearing socks?  Are their roots showing?  Are they happy?  Are they drunk?  Did they get to go #2 that morning (cause that'll change your entire day in a heartbeat!) Are their eyes rolling in stupefying boredom opening yet ANOTHER application? Are they gazing at their pencil wondering how much it would hurt to stick it in their shin? Or....have they opened mine and are now smiling.  
I tell myself to stay focused during this process.  It's a tricky one to be sure.  You can end up feeling like something the cat threw up after a time.  It can take you out at the knees and gnaw at your confidence like a pack of rabid chipmunks!  Noooooo don't let it.  It's simply a necessary evil required to get you where you want to be.  Just keep going.  Press on.  It comes together ultimately you just have to have faith.  Faith in yourself.  If they don't come stampeding to your door, shoving each other out of the way to get you first....meh....so be it.  But somebody will.  There will be a person out there who's light comes on when they see your name.  When they read what you've written.  They'll hear your voice and it will resonate. 
Yesterday I wasn't feeling the 'power' so much.  Was feeling pretty glum truth be told.  I'd applied for a job that I believed I REALLY REALLY  wanted.  It's been six weeks, pretty much safe to say it ain't gonna happen.  Ho hum.....what's to become of me?  Why am I bothering to chase dreams and throw myself out there?  I soon realized that this whole way of thinking was going to end me up face down in a bag of Cheetos.  Back away from the laptop and get the Hell out of the kitchen! 
Called my girlfriends.  It was a sunny day (although I prefer winter but saying that makes me rather unpopular) and said let's do something!  And we did.  Went out and lolled about under the scorching sun until we couldn't take it anymore. Moments away from instantaneous combustion, we picked up an avalanche of sushi and brought it home to the safe and goose bumpy environs of my overly air conditioned apartment.  Then followed an absolutely hair raising, eye popping and cheek flaming discussion on dating and the adventures found therein!  A great day.  Sanity and esteem restored. 
Today I'm back and ready to resume the 'HUNT'.  I am confident, I am calm, I am steadfast.  And bloody Hell......I WILL get that job!!  When in doubt, there's always good ol'Winnie:
You ask, what is our aim? I can answer in one word: It is victory, victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory, however long and hard the road may be.
Thank you Mr. Churchill.  And to you all my friends, fight the good fight and never EVER give in to doubt.  It's just plain silly and we don't have that kind of time.
to be continued........